Final goodbye for early web icon
BBC News ~ February 29, 2008
A web browser that gave many people their first experience of the web is set to disappear.
Netscape Navigator, now owned by AOL, will no longer be supported after 1 March 2008, the company has said.
In the mid-1990s, as the commercial web began to take off, the browser was used by more than 90% of people online.
Its market share has since slipped to just 0.6% as other browsers such as Microsoft's Internet Explorer (IE) and Firefox have eroded its user base.
The company recommends that users upgrade their browser to either Firefox or Flock, which are both built on the same underlying technologies as Navigator.
"I think we represent the hope that was of Netscape," Mitchell Baker, chair of the Mozilla Foundation which coordinates development of Firefox, told BBC News.
"We have picked up many of the things that Netscape launched but we've taken them further in terms of openness and public participation."
Ms Baker was one of the first employees at Netscape in 1994.
Netscape was created by Marc Andreessen who as a student had co-authored Mosaic, the first popular web browser.
His company Netscape Communications Corporation released the first version in 1994.
According to Shawn Hardin, President and CEO of Flock, Netscape played an important role in making the internet "a relevant mass market phenomenon".
"Netscape had a critical role in taking all of these zeros and ones - this very academic and technical environment - and giving it a graphical user interface where an average person could come online and consume information," he told BBC News.
"During its halcyon days it really felt like the internet and Netscape were really the same thing," he said.
Other companies capitalised on Netscape's success, notably Microsoft, which began to bundle IE with its Windows operating systems.
Netscape is a wonderful browser, and it will be so in the future
Comment on Netscape blog
Although this led to legal wrangles over anti-competitive behaviour, IE now dominates the browser landscape with an 80% market share.
As a result, Netscape became unviable.
"While internal groups within AOL have invested a great deal of time and energy in attempting to revive Netscape Navigator, these efforts have not been successful in gaining market share from Microsoft's Internet Explorer," said Tom Drapeau on the Netscape blog last year, when the demise of the browser was first announced.
For the past week Netscape users have been shown a message alerting them to the end of support for the browser.
"Given AOL's current business focus, support for Netscape browsers will be discontinued as of March 1st, 2008," the message reads.
It then suggests users upgrade to either Flock or Firefox.
Firefox is the main competitor to IE, particularly in Europe where it has a 28% market share, according to some statistics.
The open source browser's development is coordinated by the Mozilla foundation, set up by Netscape staff made redundant in 2003.
It has had more than 500 million downloads worldwide and in countries such as Finland it is the most popular browser.
"Competition is what brings quality," said Ms Baker.
Flock describes itself as "the social web browser" and allows people to see feeds from community websites, such as Flickr and Facebook, and post to blogs without having to navigate to the page.
"There are lots of ways that people are engaging in having a conversation and Flock is very focused on making that as effortless and convenient as possible," said Mr Hardin.
However, not all Netscape users are happy about having to change browser.
"I'm sad. Flock still needs improvement and I am not happy with Firefox's interface. I'm [an] orphan!" read one post on the Netscape blog.
Others who posted comments on the blog predicted the browser will make a return.
"Netscape is a wonderful browser, and it will be so in the future," read one.
"On a campus that is free and open, no idea can be banned or forbidden. No viewpoint or message may be deemed so hateful or disturbing that it may not be expressed. Rules that ban or punish speech based upon its content cannot be justified."
ACADEMIC FREEDOM ON UNIVERSITY CAMPUSES
1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
2. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
3. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the damn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes,turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.
4. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evily.
5. Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to a different screen than the one it's set up with.
6. Write a program that plays the "Smurfs" theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over & over again.
7. Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk.
8. Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon files.
9. Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don't know.
10. Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you turn it on.
11. Bring a chainsaw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously.
12. Type on VAX for a while. Suddenly start cursing for 3 minutes at everything bad about your life. Then stop and continue typing.
13. Enter the lab, undress, and start staring at other people as if they're crazy while typing.
14. Light candles in a pentagram around your terminal before starting.
15. Ask around for a spare disk. Offer $2. Keep asking until someone agrees. Then, pull a disk out of your fly and say, "Oops, I forgot."
16. Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes.
17. "DISK FIGHT!!!"
18. Start making out with the person at the terminal next to you (It helps if you know them, but this is also a great way to make new friends).
19. Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting the keys with the straw.
20. If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.
21. Draw a pictue of a woman (or man) on a piece of paper, tape it to your monitor. Try to seduce it. Act like it hates you and then complain loudly that women (men) are worthless.
22. Try to stick a Ninetendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disk drive. When it doesn't work, get the supervisor.
23. When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it on, ask loudly where the smiling Apple face is.
24. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, then when its all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.
25. Sit and stare at the screen, biting your nails noisily. After doing this for a while, spit them out at the feet of the person next to you.
26. Stare at the screen, grind your teeth, stop, look at the person next to you, grinding. Repeat procedure, making sure you never provoke the person enough to let them blow up, as this releases tension, and it is far more effective to let them linger.
27. If you have long hair, take a typing break, look for split ends, cut them and deposit them on your neighbor's keyboard as you leave.
28. Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.
29. Come to the lab wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and place them of top of the monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape them around the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty of cotton on plastic.
30. Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper like this. Then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the bad working conditions.
31. Laugh hysterically, shout "You will all perish in flames!!!" and continue working.
32. Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking.
33. Assign a musical note to every key (ie. the Delete key is A Flat, the B key is F sharp, etc.). Whenever you hit a key, hum its note loudly. Write an entire paper this way.
34. Attempt to eat your computer's mouse.
35. Borrow someone else's keyboard by reaching over, saying "Excuse me, mind if I borrow this for a sec?", unplugging the keyboard & taking it.
36. Bring in a bunch of magnets and have fun.
37. When doing calculations, pull out an abacus and say that sometimes the old ways are best.
38. Play Pong for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab.
39. Make a loud noise of hitting the same key over and over again until you see that your neighbor is noticing (You can hit the space bar so your fill isn't affected). Then look at your neighbor's keyboard. Hit his/her delete key several times, erasing an entire word. While you do this, ask: "Does *your* delete key work?" Shake your head, and resume hitting the space bar on your keyboard. Keep doing this until you've deleted about a page of your neighbor's document. Then, suddenly exclaim: "Well, whaddya know? I've been hitting the space bar this whole time. No wonder it wasn't deleting! Ha!" Print out your document and leave.
40. Remove your disk from the drive and hide it. Go to the lab monitor and complain that your computer ate your disk. (For special effects, put some Elmer's Glue on or around the disk drive. Claim that the computer is drooling.)
41. Stare at the person's next to your's screen, look really puzzled, burst out laughing, and say "You did that?" loudly. Keep laughing, grab your stuff and leave, howling as you go.
42. Point at the screen. Chant in a made up language while making elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, then leap back and yell "COVEEEEERRRRRR!" peek up from under the table, walk back to the computer and say. "Oh, good. It worked this time," and calmly start to type again.
43. Keep looking at invisible bugs and trying to swat them.
44. See who's online. Send a total stranger a talk request. Talk to them like you've known them all your lives. Hangup before they get a chance to figure out you're a total stranger.
45. Bring an small tape player with a tape of really absurd sound effects. Pretend it's the computer and look really lost.
46. Pull out a pencil. Start writing on the screen. Complain that the lead doesn't work.
47. Come into the computer lab wearing several endangered species of flowers in your hair. Smile incessantly. Type a sentence, then laugh happily, exclaim "You're such a marvel!!", and kiss the screen. Repeat this after every sentence. As your ecstasy mounts, also hug the keyboard. Finally, hug your neighbor, then the computer assistant, and walk out.
48. Run into the computer lab, shout "Armageddon is here!!!!!", then calmly sit down and begin to type.
49. Quietly walk into the computer lab with a Black and Decker chainsaw, rev that baby up, and then walk up to the nearest person and say, "Give me that computer or you'll be feeding my pet crocodile for the next week".
50. Two words: Tesla Coil.
Just in case you think you are TC ("Technologically Challenged"), the following is an excerpt from an article in the Wall Street Journal:
1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.
2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her Mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
3. Another Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining that the system wouldn't read word processing files from his old diskettes. The customer had stuck labels on the diskettes, then rolled them into his typewriter to type on the labels.
4. Another customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes. A few days later, a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies of the floppies.
5. A Dell technician advised a customer to put his trouble floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer asked the tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and crossing the room to close the door to his room.
6. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the tech discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
7. Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them individually.
8. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid". The tech explained that the computer's "bad" command and "invalid" responses shouldn't be taken personally.
9. A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents. He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer". The user had tried turning the computer screen to face the printer, but that his computer still couldn't "see" the printer.
10. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new Dell computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happened." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.
11. Another customer called Compaq Tech Support to say her brand-new computer wouldn't work. She said she'd unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she answered, "What Power switch?"
12. True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp: Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?" Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you? Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?" Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?" Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer." Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a tradeshow?" Caller: "It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotional. It just has '4X' on it." At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because he couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off the drive!
13. Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the second disk, and I had some problems with that disk. When it said to put in the third disk - I couldn't even fit it in.." The user hadn't realized that "Insert Disk 2" meant to remove Disk 1 first.
Computer Problem Report Form
1. Describe your problem:
2. Now, describe the problem accurately:
3. Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:
4. Problem Severity:
5. Nature of the problem:
A. Locked Up__
D. Strange Smell__
6. Is your computer plugged in? Yes__ No__
7. Is it turned on? Yes__ No__
8. Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes__ No__
9. Have you made it worse? Yes__
10. Have you had a friend who knows all about computers that can try fix it for you? Yes__ No__
11. Did they make it even worse? Yes__
12. Have you read the manual? Yes__ No__
13. Are you sure you've read the manual? Maybe__ No__
14. Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual? No__
15. If you read the manual, do you think you understood it? Yes__ No__
16. If Yes, then explain why you can't fix the problem yourself.
17. What were you doing with your computer at the time the problem occurred?
l8. If you answered nothing, then explain why you were logged in?
l9. Are you sure you aren't imagining the problem? Yes__ No__
20. Does the clock on your home VCR blink 12:00? Yes__ What's a VCR?__
21. Do you have a copy of PCs for Dummies? Yes__ No__
22. Do you have any independent witnesses to the problem? Yes__ No__
23. Do you have any electronics products that DO work? Yes__ No__
24. Is there anyone else you could blame this problem on? Yes__ No__
25. Have you given the machine a good whack on the top? Yes__ No__
26. Is the machine on fire? Yes__ Not Yet__
27. Can you do something else instead of bothering me? Yes__
How To Be Annoying In Newsgroups
* Make up fake acronyms. On-line veterans like to use abbreviations like IMHO (in my humble opinion) and RTFM (read the f...... manual) to show that they're "hip" to the lingo. Make up your own that don't stand for anything (SETO, BARL, CP30), use them liberally, and then refuse to explain what they stand for ("You don't know? RDFM").
* WRITE ALL YOUR MESSAGES IN ALL CAPS AND DON'T USE PERIODS OR RETURNS SO THAT EVERYONE HAS TO SCROLL ACROSS THEIR SCREENS TO READ EVERY LINE ALSO USE A LOT OF !!!!!! AND DDOOUUBBLLEESS TO SHOW THAT YOU'RE EXCITED ABOUT BEING HERE!!!!!!!
* When replying to your mail, correct everyone's grammar and spelling and point out their typos, but don't otherwise respond to the content of their messages. When they respond testily to your 'creative criticism," do it again. Continue until they go away.
* Software and files offered on-line are often "compressed" so that it won't take so long to travel over the phone lines. Buy a compression program and compress everything you send, including one-word E-mail responses like "Thanks."
* Upload text files with Bible passages about sin or guilt and give them names like "SexyHouseWives," then see how many people download them. Challenge your friends to come up with the most popular come-on. Take bets and calculate odds on the results of each upload's popularity.
* cc: all your E-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org so that he can keep track of what's happening on the information Superhighway Internet.
* Join a discussion group, and tie whatever's being discussed back to an unrelated central theme of your own. For instance, if you're in a discussion of gun control, respond to every message with the observation that those genetically superior tomatoes seem to have played an important role. Within days, all discussion of gun control will have ceased as people write you threatening messages and instruct all other members to ignore you.
Hello.1. Download a piece of Web authoring software - 20 minutes.
Yes, you. You, looking at this screen for hours on end, online. You, bleary-eyed. You, an addict. Have you looked in the mirror lately? Been outside? Know what day of the week it is?
Your name was given to us by a spouse or family member who is concerned about your internet addiction. At Internetaholics Anonymous, we can help. We're a non-profit society of recovering addicts like yourself that provides support and counseling through weekly meetings designed to help you cope with your problem.
We feature a twelve-step recovery program and in extreme cases, interventions. Although it is our firm belief that you are never "cured", you most certainly can recover.
We have designed a brief checklist to determine if you are an addict. Do you:
1) Have twitches of the hand when you walk by your terminal?
2) Check e-mail more than five times a day?
3) Spend more time chatting than eating or sleeping?
4) Surf aimlessly with no direction, if only to be online?
5) Leave your name and information at countless sites if only to hope you'll receive a reply one day from a
company you'll never do business with anyway?
6) Log on before important personal habits, such as meal preparation, hygiene or bodily functions?
7) Have red, swollen eyes that hang halfway out of your head?
8) Spend hours online on a holiday from work, where you'd usually be griping about your carpal tunnel syndrome?
9) See smoke arising from your computer or WebTV box?
10) All of the above?
If you answered yes to four or more questions (or chose #10), you have a problem.
Please call us at Internetaholics Anonymous at:
We're here, we're free, and we're confidential.
The first step to recovery is admission that you have a problem.
Call us today. If you can power off to free up your phone line, that is.
How To Build A Web Page In 25 Steps
2. Think about what you want to write on your Web page - 6 weeks.
3. Download the same piece of Web authoring software, because they have released 3 new versions since the first time you downloaded it - 20 minutes.
4. Decide to just steal some images and awards to put on your site - 1 minute.
5. Visit sites to find images and awards, find 5 of them that you like - 4 days.
6. Run setup of your Web authoring software. After it fails, download it again - 25 minutes.
7. Run setup again, boot the software, click all toolbar buttons to see what they do - 15 minutes.
8. View the source of others' pages, steal some, change a few words here and there - 4 hours.
9. Preview your Web page using the Web Authoring software - 1 minute.
10. Try to horizontally line up two related images - 6 hours.
11. Remove one of the images - 10 seconds.
12. Set the text's font color to the same color as your background, wonder why all your text is gone - 4 hours.
13. Download a counter from your ISP - 4 minutes.
14. Try to figure out why your counter reads "You are visitor number -16.3 E10" - 3 hours.
15. Put 4 blank lines between two lines of text - 8 hours.
16. Fine-tune the text, then prepare to load your Web page on your ISP - 40 minutes.
17. Accidentally delete your complete web page - 1 second.
18. Recreate your web page - 2 days.
19. Try to figure out how to load your Web page onto your ISP's server - 3 weeks.
20. Call a patient friend to find out about FTP - 30 minutes.
21. Download FTP software - 10 minutes.
22. Call your friend again - 15 minutes.
23. Upload your web page to your ISP's server - 10 minutes.
24. Connect to your site on the web - 1 minute.
25. Repeat any and all of the previous steps - eternity.
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most do.
-- Dale Carnegie
A sense of curiosity is nature's original school of education.
-- Smiley Blanton, MD
There is nothing permanent except change.
With reasonable men I will reason,
With humane men I will plead,
But tyrants I will give no quarter,
Nor waste words where they will surely be lost.
Injure others, injure yourself.
-- Chinese Proverb
Injuries may be forgiven, but not forgotten.
"Never explain - your friends do not need it and your enemies will
not believe it anyhow."
- Elbert Hubbard
From the now defunct Electronic Plagiarism Site
Detecting Plagiarism ~ Tips ~ Guides ~ Policies ~ Procedures ~ Detection Software
"Responding to cheating is perhaps one of the most distasteful, time-consuming, and undervalued tasks that a teacher can face." (Cizek 151)
Cyberplagiarism, cut and paste, cybercheating, high tech cheating, "patch writing," (R. M. Howard), theft of intellectual property: all these terms describe ways students use other's words and ideas without attribution, whether deliberately or inadvertently.
As more and more information appears on the Internet and in other electronic formats, making it easily accessible, it becomes equally easy to download, cut, and paste, presenting the information as one's own. In the past it was not uncommon for students to copy verbatim from something like Cliffs Notes, an encyclopedia, or MasterPlots. Now even lecture notes and Power Point presentations are available, and can be used to create papers and as a way of avoiding attending classes.
Students no longer need to come to the library, use library materials, borrow from a roommate, or purchase the Notes, but rather can find essays and papers quickly and easily, download, reformat (if they choose and if they have time), and turn in. Try typing topicpapers.com, e.g. literaturepapers.com, to see how easy it is. They even provide you with links to other topics!
Graduate students too have resources available that allow them to avoid writing a thesis or a dissertation. Options range from bidding on one on ebay.com to buying a pre-written one, or if they are feeling less daring and have more money, paying someone to write the paper.
Given the pressures students feel to produce a number of papers and to get good grades, they may feel it is not worth their time to write an original paper for a class not in their major. Students give a variety of excuses for plagiarizing, ranging from "I didn't know." to "I don't care." They may know of peers who have plagiarized successfully, which in turn discourages them from doing their own work. Remember, those who don't get caught talk, those who get caught don't talk, so the perception among students is that everyone gets away with it.
It is up to us to insure that students can never claim that they did not know what constitutes plagiarism, and to give them all the tools they need to do their own work and to do it well.
One blog created 'every second'
BC NEWS ~ August 2, 2005
The blogosphere is continuing to grow, with a weblog created every second, according to blog trackers Technorati. In its latest State of the Blogosphere report, it said the number of blogs it was tracking now stood at more than 14.2m blogs, up from 7.8m in March. It suggests, on average, the number of blogs is doubling every five months.
Blogs, the homepages of the 21st Century, are free and easy to set up and use. They are popular with people who want to share thoughts online. They allow for the instant publication of ideas and for interactive conversations, through comments, with friends or strangers.
Technorati is like a search engine that keeps track of what is happening in the blogosphere, the name given to the universe of weblogs. It relies on people tagging - giving keywords to - their blogs or blog posts so that its search engine can find them. Free blogging services such as those provided by MSN Spaces, Blogger, LiveJournal, AOL Journals, WordPress and Movable Type were also growing quickly, said the report. Thirteen percent of all blogs that Technorati tracks are updated weekly or more, said the report, and 55% of all new bloggers are still posting three months after they started.
It also pointed to the growth in moblogs, blogs to which people with camera phones automatically send pictures and text.
Other services, such as the Google toolbar and the Flickr photo sharing website, have implemented "blog this" buttons, which also make it easier for people to post content they like on the web straight to their blogs. The voices in the blogosphere are also sounding less US-centric, with blog growth spotted in Japan, Korea, China, UK, France, and Brazil.
What is clear is that the blogosphere is highly varied, with blogs coming in many shapes and forms, whether they be professional or for personal use. Blogs have been used as campaign sites, as personal diaries, as art projects, online magazines and as places for community networking. Much of their appeal has been boosted because readers can subscribe to them, for free, to stay updated of any new posts automatically. Blogs have played a part in highlighting issues that journalists have not covered. They have also proved to be a valuable communication channel for journalists in repressed countries who have no other publishing means. They have recently shown how they can also complement and enhance mainstream press in coverage of events, such as the recent London terror attacks.© BBC MMV
Exam phone finds 'must mean fail'
BBC NEWS: August 1, 2005
Scottish exam chiefs say disqualifying pupils caught with mobile phones is a matter of fairness to all candidates. More than 100 pupils will be failed in Higher and Standard Grade papers because they took phones into their exam halls.
The Scottish Qualification Authority (SQA) insists pupils were warned that anyone caught would be disqualified, even if there was no proof of cheating. Scotland's exam results are due out on 9 August. The SQA has had 109 allegations of mobile phone abuse referred to it by schools, most of which were not direct attempts at cheating. But Mike Haggerty, the authority's director of communications, told BBC Radio's Good Morning Scotland programme a tough stance had to be taken.
Judith Gillespie, of the Scottish Parent Teacher Council, said there was no point in having a rule if it was not enforced.
Scottish Secondary Teachers' Association general secretary David Eaglesham also backed the sanctions. Mr Eaglesham said: "This is the electronic version of when people used to hide little folded up bits of paper behind their ears in the dim and distant past."© BBC MMV
QUOTES FROM THE IRAQI INFORMATION MINISTER
January 12 - Furloughed Iraqi Information Minister Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf (M.S.S.) has a brand
new "gig" - TV talking head for Abu Dhabi TV! His latest commentary on the capture of Saddam included this, uh, curious statement: "The expected trial needs evidence to be submitted. Everybody talks about war crimes and the like. But the court
considers facts and evidence only." Because we all know how much M.S.S. believes in the sanctity of facts and evidence we present some of his memorable quotes made during the Iraq invasion.
-- TREASURY OF DEATHLESS QUOTES --
- "There are no American infidels in Baghdad. Never!"
- "My feelings - as usual - we will slaughter them all"
- "Our initial assessment is that they will all die"
- "I blame Al-Jazeera - they are marketing for the Americans!"
- "God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis."
- "They're coming to surrender or be burned in their tanks."
- "No I am not scared, and neither should you be!"
- "Be assured. Baghdad is safe, protected"
- "Who are in control, they are not in control of anything - they don't even control themselves!"
- "We are not afraid of the Americans. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid" (dramatic pause) "and they are condemned."
- "The Americans, they always depend on a method what I call ... stupid, silly. All I ask is check yourself. Do not in fact repeat their lies."
- "I can say, and I am responsible for what I am saying, that they have started to commit suicide under the walls of Baghdad. We will encourage them to commit more suicides quickly."
- "I can assure you that those villains will recognize, will discover in appropriate time in the future how stupid they are and how they are pretending things which have never taken place."
- "We have destroyed 2 tanks, fighter planes, 2 helicopters and their shovels - We have driven them back."
- "The authority of the civil defense ... issued a warning to the civilian population not to pick up any of those pencils because they are booby traps," he said, adding that the British and American forces were "immoral mercenaries" and "war criminals" for such behavior. "I am not talking about the American people and the British people," he said. "I am talking about those mercenaries. ... They have started throwing those pencils, but they are not pencils, they are booby traps to kill the children."
- "We have them surrounded in their tanks"
- "The American press is all about lies! All they tell is lies, lies and more lies!"
- "I have detailed information about the situation...which completely proves that what they allege are illusions . . . They lie every day."
- "Lying is forbidden in Iraq. President Saddam Hussein will tolerate nothing but truthfulness as he is a man of great honor and integrity. Everyone is encouraged to speak freely of the truths evidenced in their eyes and hearts."
- "Now even the American command is under siege. We are hitting it from the north, east, south and west. We chase them here and they chase us there. But at the end we are the people who are laying siege to them. And it is not them who are besieging us."
- "Let the American infidels bask in their illusion"
- "I triple guarantee you, there are no American soldiers in Baghdad."
- Britain "is not worth an old shoe"
- Of US troops: "They are most welcome. We will butcher them."
- "We will welcome them with bullets and shoes."
- "We are in control. They are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by killing civilians and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards."
- "The British forces which were dropped there have been eliminated mostly on the (battle)field, except for those who fled ... It is a complete defeat ... Amazingly the Americans have pushed the British to do that. They pushed them ahead as if it is an experiment. The result was very tragic for the British."
- “We have placed them in a quagmire from which they can never emerge except dead”
- "Washington has thrown their soldiers on the fire"
- "I speak better English than this villain Bush"
- "These cowards have no morals. They have no shame about lying"
- "They're not even [within] 100 miles [of Baghdad]. They are not in any place. They hold no place in Iraq. This is an illusion ... they are trying to sell to the others an illusion."
- "Their failure in this regard is abysmal. They want to tell the world changes thought - as a matter of fact, they do not respect the world, they want to tell taxpayers and the domestic public to keep them deceived. We will embroil them, confuse them and keep them in the quagmire. They have begun to tell more lies so that they might continue with the perpetration of their crimes. May they be accursed."
- "We will kill them all........most of them."
- "They are like a snake and we are going to cut it in pieces."
- "They do not even have control over themselves! Do not believe them!"
- "I would like to clarify a simple fact here: How can you lay siege to a whole country? Who is really under siege now? Baghdad cannot be besieged. Al-Nasiriyah cannot be besieged. Basra cannot be besieged."
- "That bastard the American Minister of Defense Rumsfeld, and I won't say shamelessly, because they don't know what shame means. These are criminals. The whole word can hear the warning sirens. This criminal sitting in the White House is a pathetic criminal and his Defense Minister deserves to be beaten. These criminals lie to the world because they are criminals by nature and conditioning. They consider this a military site! Shame on you! You will forever be shamed! You have ruined the
- reputation of the American people in the most terrible way! Shame on you! And we will destroy you!"
- "They are trapped in Umm Qasr. They are trapped near Basra. They are trapped near Nasiriyah. They are trapped near Najaf. They are trapped everywhere."
- Called Americans and Brits "Tarateer"– In Iraqi slang, Tartoor means a guy full of farts (i.e. hot air)
- "they are nowhere near the airport ..they are lost in the desert...they can not read a compass...they are retarded."
- "They are not in Baghdad. They are not in control of any airport. I tell you this. It is all a lie. They lie. It is a hollywood movie. You do not believe them."
- "Faltering forces of infidels cannot just enter a country of 26 million people and lay besiege to them! They are the ones who will find themselves under siege. Therefore, in reality whatever this miserable Rumsfeld has been saying, he was talking about his own forces. Now even the American command is under siege."
- "They tried to bring a small number of tanks and personnel carriers in through al-Durah but they were surrounded and most of their infidels had their throats cut."
- "Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly."
- "We made them drink poison last night and Saddam Hussein's soldiers and his great forces gave the Americans a lesson which will not be forgotten by history. Truly."
- "On this occasion, I am not going to mention the number of the infidels who were killed and the number of destroyed vehicles. The operation continues"
- "We're giving them a real lesson today. Heavy doesn't accurately describe the level of casualties we have inflicted."
- "Their infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Baghdad. Be assured, Baghdad is safe, protected."
- "Today I have visited whole Baghdad city, no invaders found. You go and see how we have ousted them from this city. They are cying outside and waiting to receive bullets. They will be killed shortly."
- "These images are not the suburbs of Baghdad. From what I glimpsed, these gardens with rows of palm trees on the side, which you saw in the images, are located in the south of Abu Ghreib, where we have surrounded the Americans and British."
- When told coalition troops occupied Baghdad airport - "...at Saddam Airport? Now that's just silly!"
- "The situation is excellent, they are going to try to approach Baghdad...and I believe their grave will be there."
- "NO", snapped Mr al-Sahaf, "We have retaken the airport. There are NO Americans there. I will take you there and show you. IN ONE HOUR!"
- "We defeated them yesterday. God willing, I will provide you with more information. I swear by God, I swear by God, those who are staying in Washington and London have thrown these mercenaries in a crematorium."
- "Please, please! The Americans are relying on what I called yesterday a desperate and stupid method."
- "Today we slaughtered them in the airport. They are out of Saddam International Airport. The force that was in the airport, this force was destroyed."
- "They are trying to fool you. They are showing any old pictures of buildings. They even went into the VIP section of the airport, just because Saddam Hussein may have sat in such and such a chair or slept in such and such a bed"
- "We went into the airport and crushed them, we cleaned the WHOOOLE place out, they were slaughtered"
- "Yes, the american troops have advanced further. This will only make it easier for us to defeat them"
- [On surrenders] "Those are not Iraqi soldiers at all. Where did they bring them from?"
- "Just look carefully, I only want you to look carefully. Do not repeat the lies of liars. Do not become like them. Once again, I blame al-Jazeera before it ascertains what takes place. Please, make sure of what you say and do not play such a role."
- "Search for the truth. I tell you things and I always ask you to verify what I say. I told you yesterday that there was an attack and a retreat at Saddam's airport."
- "I have detailed information about the situation . . . which completely proves that what they allege are illusions . . . They lie every day."
- "You can go and visit those places. Nothing there, nothing at all. There are Iraqi checkpoints. Everything is okay."
- "This boa, the American columns, are being besieged between Basra and other towns north, west, south and west of Basra....Now even the American command is under siege. We are hitting it from the north, east, south and west. We chase them here and they chase us there."
- "By God, I think this is rather very unlikely. This is merely a prattle. The fact is that as soon as they reach Baghdad gates, we will besiege them and slaughter them....Wherever they go they will find themselves encircled."
- "They (the U.S.) are deceiving their soldiers and their officers that aggressing against Iraq and invading Iraq will be like a picnic. This is a very stupid lie they are telling their soldiers, what they are facing is a definite death."
- "Listen, this explosion does not frighten us any langer. The cruise missiles do not frighten anyone. We are catching them like fish in a river. I mean here that over the past two days we managed to shoot down 196 missiles before they hit their target."
- "Blair...is accusing us of executing British soldiers. We want to tell him that we have not executed anybody. They are either killed in battle, most of them get killed because they are cowards anyway, the rest they just get captured."
- "They fled. The American louts fled. Indeed, concerning the fighting waged by the heroes of the Arab Socialist Baath Party yesterday, one amazing thing really is the cowardice of the American soldiers. we had not anticipated this."
- "We will slaughter them, Bush Jr. and his international gang of bastards!"
- "The forces of American colonialism began to drop containers that produce a sound explosion, a very huge sound. I remind you that they said that their strategy is based on shock and awe. Those failed ones manufactured a type of container that has an explosive substance, which they drop. They cause a very huge explosion in terms of sound, as if the universe was shaken. After a while, you go out and you don't find anything. You find some nails, screws, pieces of metal, but the important thing here is the sound. Those failed ones think that through the huge sound explosion, people would be shocked and consequently would collapse and be defeated. What happened? The contrary. The fighters..., the masses..., and the heroic sons of the Iraqi tribes discovered this game. They will turn it against the American louts so as to shock them. Wait for surprises, God willing, to see how the US game will fail."
- "The shock has backfired on them. They are shocked because of what they have seen. No one received them with roses. They were received with bombs, shoes and bullets. Now, the game has been exposed. Awe will backfire on them. This is the boa snake. We will extend it further and cut it the appropriate way."
- "It has been rumored that we have fired scud missiles into Kuwait. I am here now to tell you, we do not have any scud missiles and I don't know why they were fired into Kuwait."
"As for the mercenaries who advanced to the perimeters of Saddam International Airport, I would like to remind you of something. I will mention something that will make the picture clear for you and help you to understand what took place at Saddam International Airport. Most of you probably saw the American movie "Wag the Dog". I hope you remember it. Some of their acts that took place at dawn yesterday and today are similar to what happened in "Wag the Dog". If we succeed in keeping them isolated on that island, and we are determined to do so, we might let them taste a second mini Dien Bien Phu tonight. The European journalists remember it well. Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly. They are completely surrounded now. This morning, the number of armoured personnel carriers that were destroyed, along with their occupants, is eight. The number of the tanks destroyed is 11."
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