Volume 7
A Fun Site created by
Professor William Hillman culled from a daily motivational series
compiled for his BU Education Classes 2000-2009
The daily tech news items have been omitted since many of the stories are now "old news."

An eclectic collection of oddities, humorous anecdotes, weird photos, funny headlines, cartoons, puzzles, inspirational items, jokes, and more. . .  gathered here as a reference repository for speakers, lecturers, teachers, students, writers, or Web travellers just looking for diversion and a bit of levity. 

Click above image  for full collage
Go to Rare Photos Page #7


An optical illusion photo taken of a Lufthansa 747-400 and a United Airlines 757-200 that were on simultaneous approaches to runways 28L and 28R at San Francisco (SFO). The separation requirement for flying parallel and simultaneous approaches is 225 meters (738 feet). These two aircraft are at a safe distance for the approaches they are each flying. "Planeillusion"

Top Sites in the United States: Tabulated by Alexa ranking service.
1.  Yahoo!
Personalized content and search options. Chatrooms, free e-mail, clubs, and pager.
2. Google
Enables users to search the Web, Usenet, and images. Features include PageRank, caching and translation of results, and an option to find similar pages. The company's focus is developing search technology.
3. Myspace
Social Networking Site.
4.  Microsoft Network (MSN)
Dialup access and content provider.
5.  EBay
International person to person auction site, with products sorted into categories.
6.  YouTube
User-submitted videos with rating, comments, and contests.
7.  Amazon.com
Amazon.com seeks to be Earth's most customer-centric company, where customers can find and discover anything they might want to buy online, and endeavors to offer its customers the lowest possible prices. 
8.  Craigslist.org
9.  Wikipedia
A free encyclopedia built collaboratively using Wiki software. (GNU Free Documentation License).
10.  Thefacebook
An online directory that connects people through social networks at colleges. FAQ, news coverage, schools covered, and terms of use.
11.  Windows Live
Search engine from Microsoft.
12.  Blogger.com
Free, automated weblog publishing tool that sends updates to a site via FTP.
13.  CNN - Cable News Network
Includes US and international stories and analysis, weather, video clips, and program schedule.
14.  Go
A searchable directory, news, stocks, sports and free e-mail.
15.  AOL
America On Line's portal, offering search, shopping, channels, chat and mail.
16.  Microsoft Corporation
Official site. Find out about products and services, read company news, or check out job openings. Also offers product support, downloads, and learning tools.
17.  The Internet Movie Database
Features plot summaries, reviews, cast lists, and theatre schedules.
18.  Comcast.net
 Internet Service Provider
19.  Digg
Technology focused news site where the stories are chosen by community members rather than editors.
20.  Flickr
Picture galleries available with social networking, chat, groups, and photo ratings.
21.  Weather.com
Offers forecasts for cities worldwide as well as radar and satellite maps. Also includes news stories and allergy information.
22.  The New York Times
Online edition of the newspaper's recent content with searchable archives for a fee. [Registration required]
23.  Apple Computer, Inc.
Apple's main homepage.
24.  About
Directory features links, articles and reviews.
25.  MapQuest
Find directions for and explore towns and cities worldwide. Display addresses on a map, view nearby businesses, get driving directions and maps, and plan a trip with city information. Also includes aerial photographs of selected areas.

Alexa comparison chart:
Hillman ERBzine site (blue) and Brandon University site (red)
Traffic over the last half year.

Hamster TechCaffeine Machine
                                                                    Hamster Tech    ~    Caffeine Machine

The world's easiest quiz
Get only 4 correct answers to pass:

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
3) From which animal do we get catgut?
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
7) What was King George VI's first name?
8) What color is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
10) Who is buried in Grant's Tomb?

All done? Wasn't that EASY? Now, check your answers in the "invisible" space below!

(Hilite the white space below to see the answers appear)
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? *116 years
2) Which country makes Panama hats? *Ecuador
3) From which animal do we get cat gut? *Sheep and Horses
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?*November
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?   *Squirrel fur
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?*Dogs
7) What was King George VI's first name?    *Albert
8) What color is a purple finch? *Crimson
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?  *New Zealand
10) No one. His coffin is above ground level.

What do you mean you failed?
Pass this on to some other of your "brilliant" friends.


I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry.  Come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?
~ age 15

Home is where the house is.
~ age 6

For centuries, people thought the moon was made of green cheese.  Then the astronauts found that the moon is really a big hard rock.  That's what happens to cheese when you leave it out.
~ age 6

As you make your way through this hetic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day.  At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up.
~ age 7

If we could just get everyone to close their eyes and visualize world peace for an hour, imagine how serene and quiet it would be until the looting started.
~ age 15

~ Huck

Where we were a century ago.
Just think what it will be like in another 100 years. It boggles the mind...
~ Roy
Baked Palm Pilot


This is an actual job application that a 17 year old boy submitted to Wal-Mart in Florida... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!

NAME: Greg Bulmash.

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.


LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.



PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more
intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, wouldn't I be here?


DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may aready be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

Yes. Absolutely.


Evolution of Authority

Too Busy for a Friend...

One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name.

Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.

It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.

That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual.

On Monday she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire class was smiling. "Really?" she heard whispered. "I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!" and, "I didn't know others liked me so much." were most of the comments.

No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of students moved on.

Several years later, one of the students was killed in Viet Nam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked so handsome, so mature.

The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin.

As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. "Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. She nodded: "yes."

Then he said: "Mark talked about you a lot."

After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a luncheon. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher.

"We want to show you something," his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket. "They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it."

Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him.

"Thank you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can see, Mark treasured it."

All of Mark's former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, "I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home."

Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album."

"I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary."

Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. "I carry this with me at all times," Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: "I think we all saved our lists."

That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.

The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day.

And we don't know when that one day will be.

So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late.

~ David

Matador Training School

You know you are living in the year 2008 when:

1. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is because they do not have e-mail.

2. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.

3. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.

4. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.

5. Every commercial on television has a web site address at the bottom of the screen.

6. You buy a computer and 2 months later it's out of date and sells for half the price you paid.

7. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go get it.

8. Using real money, instead of credit or debit card, to make a purchase would be a hassle and take planning.

9. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.

10. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.

11. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.

12. Your idea of being organized is multiple-coloured Post-it notes.

13. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.

14. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.

15. You disconnect from the Internet and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

16. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.

17. You wake up at 2 AM to go to the bathroom and check your E-mail on your way back to bed.

18. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.

19. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

20. You say to your significant other, "You've got to read this joke"... to which comes the reply, "Forward it to me"!



The World's Funniest Joke -- Official

LONDON (Reuters) - After a year of painstaking scientific research, the world's funniest joke was revealed on Thursday.

In a project described as the largest-ever scientific study into humor, the British Association for the Advancement of Science ( news - web sites) asked Internet users around the world to submit their favorite jokes and rate the funniness of
 other people's offerings.

More than 40,000 jokes from 70 countries and two million critiques later, this is

"Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his phone and calls emergency services.

He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure  he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

Back on the phone, the hunter says, "Ok, now what?"

Researchers found significant differences between nations in the types of jokes  they found funny.

People from the UK, the Republic of Ireland, Australia and New Zealand preferred gags involving word play, such as:

PATIENT: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum."

DOCTOR: "I've got some cream for that."

Americans and Canadians favored jokes where people were made to look stupid.
TEXAN: "Where are you from?"

HARVARD GRAD: "I come from a place where we do not end our sentences
with prepositions."

TEXAN: "OK -- where are you from, jackass?"

Meanwhile, many Europeans liked gags that were surreal or made light of serious subjects such as illness, death and marriage:
A patient says, "Doctor, last night I made a Freudian slip, I was having dinner
with my mother-in-law and wanted to say: 'Could you please pass the butter?'

"But instead I said: 'You silly cow, you have completely ruined my life.'"

Marriage-mocking also featured in the top American joke:
"A man and a friend are playing golf one day. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course.

"He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: 'Wow that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are truly a kind man.'

"The man then replies: 'Yeah, well, we were married 35 years.'"

Death earned big laughs in Scotland:
"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror like his passengers."
And animals figured prominently. Take the number one joke in England:
"Two weasels are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, 'I slept with your mother!'

"The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do.

"The first again yells, 'I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!'

"The other says: 'Go home dad, you're drunk.'"

The survey revealed other fun facts:
-- Of the countries rating the highest number of jokes, Germans, perhaps
 surprisingly, laughed the most. Canadians laughed least.

-- If you want to tell a funny animal joke, make it a duck.

 -- The most frequently submitted joke, at 300 times, was: "What's brown and sticky? A stick."

Researchers said no one ever found it funny.
The findings can be read at www.laughlab.co.uk




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