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Anonymous

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Several thousand years ago, a small tribe of ignorant near-savages wrote various collections of myths, wild tales, lies, and gibberish. Over the centuries, these stories were embroidered, garbled, mutilated, and torn into small pieces that were then repeatedly shuffled. Finally, this material was badly translated into several languages successively. The resultant text, creationists feel, is the best guide to this complex and technical subject.

Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.

If forgiveness is devine, why is there a hell?

Organized religion is like organized crime; it preys on peoples' weaknesses, generates huge profits for its operators, and is almost impossible to eradicate.

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day; give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish.

Religion is to brain what tapeworm is to intestine.

Better to be thought a fool, than to open your bible and remove all doubt.

The Religious Right. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Whatever a man prays for, he prays for a miracle.

'God is as real as I am', the old man said. I was relieved since I knew Santa wouldn't lie to me...

If god doesn't like the way I live, Let him tell me, not you.

There are none more ignorant and useless, than they that seek answers on their knees, with their eyes closed.

Faith is deciding to allow yourself to believe something your intellect would otherwise cause you to reject -- otherwise there's no need for faith.

Any belief worth having must survive doubt.

If you ask the wrong questions you get answers like '42' or 'God'.

It seems odd that those who scoff at sun worshippers are apt to worship a vacuum.

Agnosticism simply means that a man shall not say he knows or believes that for which he has no grounds for professing to believe.

Humanity's first sin was faith; the first virtue was doubt.

Power corrupts; Absolute power corrupts absolutely; God is all-powerful. Draw your own conclusions

Theists think all gods but theirs are false. Atheists simply don't make an exception for the last one.

You don't pray in my school, and I won't think in your church.

A zealot's stones will break my bones, but gods will never hurt me.

Nine out of ten priests who have tried Camels, prefer young boys.

A society without religion is like a crazed psychopath without a loaded .45

Two hands working do more than a thousand clasped in prayer

Garbage In -- Gospel Out

Theology: The study of elaborate verbal disguises for non-ideas.

Religions are what dreams are made of.

All Gods were immortal.

Consider the ignorance of the average fundamentalist. Then realize that by definition fully half of them must be even dumber than that.

The mind of the fundamentalistis like the pupil of the eye: the more light you pour on it, the more it will contract.

Out of convicted rapists, 57% admitted to reading pornography. 95% admitted to reading the Bible.

You'll never find a dead Christian in a foxhole who didn't pray.

Freedom is the Distance Between Church and State

When The Religious Right Takes Over, We'll All Live In Iran

A metaphysician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that isn't there, and a theologian is one who finds the cat.

Only Sheep need a shepherd!

Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?"
Priest: "No, not if you did not know."
Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?" 

Gods are fragile things; they may be killed by a whiff of science or a dose of common sense." 

The only difference between religion and superstition is the spelling.

A lie is at the heart of 'beLIEf.'

 If god doesn't like the way I live, let him tell me, not you.

Why be born again, when you can just grow up?

Fundamentalism means never having to say 'I'm wrong.'

Since the Bible and the church are obviously mistaken in telling us where we came from, how can we trust them to tell us where we are going?

On the first day, man created God.

Atheists will celebrate life, while you’re in church celebrating death.

Jesus hardly made the greatest sacrifice. He knew he would be resurrected anyway.

A believer states everything must have a creator but fail to say how he was created.

Don't pray in my school, and I won't think in your church.

You keep believing, I'll keep evolving.

People who don't like their beliefs being laughed at shouldn't have such funny beliefs.

Man created God in his image : intolerant, sexist, homophobic and violent.

Morality is doing what is right no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told no matter what is right.

Christian: I'll pray for you. Atheist: Then I'll think for both of us.

Christianity: Safer than a lobotomy, but just as effective.

Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.

I have no need for religion, I have a conscience. 

Blind faith is an ironic gift to return to the Creator of human intelligence.

Doesn`t it bother you that you put more logical thought into choosing a car than you do in choosing a god? 

George Bush says he speaks to god every day, and christians love him for it. If George Bush said he spoke to god through his hair dryer, they would think he was mad. I fail to see how the addition of a hair dryer makes it any more absurd.

The same people that wrote the bible thought the world was flat.

Be happy while you're living, for you're a long time dead. ~ Scottish proverb

It makes no difference as to the name of the God, since love is the real God of all in the world. ~ Apache

Humanity without religion is like a serial killer without a chainsaw.

If you speak the truth, have one foot in the stirrup. ~ Turkish proverb

Science is the great antidote to the poison of enthusiasm and superstition.

For god so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever would believe in him would believe in anything.

It's your god. / They're your rules. / You go to hell. 

BILLBOARDS:
There’s a REASON why atheists don’t fly airplanes into buildings.
Two hands working can do more than a thousand clasped in prayer.
The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.
The sailor does not pray for wind, he learns to sail.
There’s probably no god. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.
If triangles had a god he’d have three sides.
If we were made in god’s image, why aren’t we invisible too?
All religions are fairy tales.
Religion is myth-information.
Too stupid to understand science? Try religion.

Even it there was a god, why would he be so bored as to create a universe just to look at?  Bored enough to play games with the human race?  I cannot belive in a god, because if he were real, I would have to hate him for his evil.

Want to know what happens after death? Go look at some dead things. 

The Bible: because all the works of science cannot equal the wisdom of cattle-sacrificing primitives who though every animal species in the world lived within walking distance of Noah's house.

God made me an atheist. Who are you to question his wisdom.

Like all religions, the Holy Religion of the Invisible Pink Unicorn is based upon both Logic and Faith. We have Faith that She is Pink; we Logically know that She is Invisible, because we can't see Her. 

Religions: They can't all be right. They can all be wrong.

. . . . Mithras, Zeus, Horus, Wotan, Yahweh, Allah . . .

I haven't rejected god, I've never met him.

Science Flies You To The Moon; Religion Flies You Into Buildings!

There's probably no god. . . so now stop worrying and enjoy life.

Appraise the Lord. Tax churches.

If you believe the meek will inherit the earth you're just where they want you.

Prayer: How to do nothing and still think you’re helping.

Without God, life is everything.

Atheism is a religion like not collecting stamps is a hobby.